Let's Dissect the 2e Monster Manual's Dragons - Copper Dragon

Doesn’t he just look jolly?

For the record, I’m still working on the rest of the UHoG series, but when you have to write a blog post that’s nothing but a bunch of reviews of dad games, I think you can understand my lack of enthusiasm.

I’m sure there’s an ACAB joke you guys can make, but you’ll want to save it for later. Possibly a lot later, but trust me. It’ll be worth it.

Copper dragons are incorrigible pranksters, joke tellers, and riddlers.
Prankster + D&D 2e = Oh Gosh’s fucking beer gut.

Yes, it’s the “Just a prank, bro!” dragon, in all his glory.

Let's Dissect the 2e Monster Manual's Dragons - Bronze Dragon

The sexy overbite is sadly marred by the wall-eyed face and weird spiked nostrils.

Bronze dragons are inquisitive and fond of humans and demi-humans.

“Inquisitive” is almost never a good sign, when 2e is involved.

They enjoy polymorphing into small, friendly animals so they can unobtrusively observe humans and demi-humans, especially adventurers.

So, they’re pretty much they’re pretty much the squirrels you see in any given overhead shot of our characters in a forest. No, seriously, look at any of those scenes again; those fuckers? Secretly bronze dragons.

Bronze dragons thrive on simple challenges such as riddles and harmless contests.

Just don’t challenge ‘em to a peeing-for-distance contest. The local wildlife will avoid that place for weeks.